Grey Hair and Graduation

Me, praying that I make it back to my seat without going head over heels down the stairs.

Twenty two years ago I graduated with a BEd in Primary Teaching and never for one moment expected to graduate again for a second time.  But last Friday, I was strutting across the stage of the Albert Halls (no, not THE Royal Albert Hall in London) in Stirling to receive my masters degree in Creative Writing. With Merit!

This time around I had a new surname (pronounced incorrectly at the ceremony. Grrr!!!) was much heavier, with wrinkles round the eyes and straight from an emergency hairdresser appointment to cover my grey haired roots. And yet, I still felt great.

There was a fantastic atmosphere at the ceremony and the Chancellor of the University, Dr James Naughtie delivered a thought-provoking and inspiring speech about his recent trip to Delhi where he encountered young children living in extreme poverty and yet they had high ambitions for their future careers.

Soppy caption alert! “Without your unconditional love and support, none of it would have been possible…”

It was a timely reminder for me that I am very lucky to have had the financial and the emotional support of my long-suffering hubby which allowed me to pursue my writing goals. He has been there for me every step of the way and almost never got to see me graduate when I somehow managed to lose his golden ticket for the ceremony, only to reclaim it at the ‘robing room’ with minutes to spare!


So now I can call myself Helen MacKinven BEd MLitt but I’m still wondering what I want to be when I grow up. When I left my day job to commit to the MLitt course full-time, I was never under any illusion that the qualification would lead to an amazing job in the literary world. But I did hope that it would mean that I could gain the credibility to call myself a proper writer, whatever that means.

My writing buddy, Anne Glennie likened the MLitt course as a sort of ‘kite mark’ for your writing skills in that it indicates a certain level of quality. Of course it doesn’t mean that because I’ve completed a uni course that I’m a better writer than someone who doesn’t have a formal qualification but it does mean that my effort to develop my writing skills has been professionally recognised.

The MLitt course at Stirling University was recently featured in the Herald’s Scottish Review of Books where the course was described as “taught by writers for writers”.  This was one of the highlights for me as the course was led by award-winning fiction writer Paula Morris and during the two semesters I had the opportunity to learn from Andrew O’Hagan, DBC Pierre, Linda Cracknell, Eleanor Updale and Ewan Morrison. There’s no way that I would ever have had the chance to engage with such talented individuals so for that reason alone the course was invaluable.

But where to now? Getting the degree was the end of one chapter and the beginning of another. I’ve got the official rubber stamp to prove that I’m serious about my writing, it’s more than a hobby for me, but that doesn’t mean that I have a new career, well not yet. Like most other writers, I need a day job too and after a year out to indulge myself in pursuing my passion, I need to strike a balance between time for writing and contributing to the household income, well at least until I publish that best seller I’m working on…

#amwriting But Why?

This was the first week of no classes at uni and it was a lonely week with no writing banter. Writing is a solitary experience so I’ve been using Twitter to connect with other writers. It’s like a virtual water cooler or my trips to the photocopier in my last job where you’d hear all the office gossip.

In case you’re not on Twitter, a hash tag is simply a way for folk to search for tweets that have a common topic and to begin a conversation. A popular hash tag used by writers is #amwriting and it’s a good way to learn from others and share the ups and downs of writing. But I wonder how many writers using the #amwriting hash tag actually stop and ask themselves, WHY am I writing?

“Why do you write?” was the first question my mentor asked us when we met him last week to discuss our dissertation ideas. Myself and two others from my MLItt class are very lucky to be given the chance to be mentored by the acclaimed writer and filmmaker, Ewan Morrison.

He has just launched a new book, ‘Tales from the Mall’ that you really should get your mitts on as it’s been described by Catherine O’Flynn, Costa prize winning author, as “A wonderful and important book”.

Ewan asked us to quickly make up a list of the positive and negative reasons for writing and to be honest!  The two lists made interesting and sometimes cringe worthy reading. As they say on the X Factor, in no particular order, here is the group’s results.

Negative                                                                            Positive

Money                                                                                  Social/political commentary

Status                                                                                   Escapism

Self-aggrandisement                                                          Entertainment

Self-indulgence                                                                   Ethics/philosophy

Revenge                                                                               Experiment with language

The list was not extensive but it was enough to get us discussing the good and bad reasons for writing and to analyse the ones which related most to our own ambitions as writers. How many writers would be willing to admit that they believe that they might make a lot of money writing books, that they will be famous and will be respected and remembered? But even if you’re prepared to admit that fame and fortune were your original writing goals, for the vast majority of writers, that will not be the case and this means they need to work out the other reasons why they write.

For me, it is the love of words and a creative outlet that I can’t imagine ever giving up. I’ve always been an avid reader and I now have the egotistical desire to be a creator rather than just a consumer. I love writing or there would be no point in locking myself away for hours on end. And I definitely wouldn’t have given up a permanent job to do the MLitt course if I didn’t feel passionately about writing. Writing is part of who I am.

All I need to do now is get my head around why I need to write this particular story.  After endless revisions, I need to take a step back and figure out what exactly I’m trying to say with my WIP and then figure out the best way to achieve it.  The world does not need my book but I need to write it. I write because I have to, why do you write?